I may have mentioned it a time or two hereabouts, but I sure do love that television programme The Sopranos, and right about now it feels like it’s ending way too quickly. (The final episode ever, “Made in America,” airs this Sunday night. There may be a small amount of media hype about this.) Having said that, it’s probably also true that the show went on too long. I’m not really talking about the endless waits between seasons – in the end, I think that worked to the series’ advantage in allowing the characters to age realistically (go back and take a look at plump little AJ Soprano in the pilot – or relatively svelte Tony, for that matter) and bonding fans closer to them through endless reruns and DVD releases plugging the gaps. Our associate John at Last Visible Blog oft extols the virtues of the British system – shorter seasons and fewer of them – and The Sopranos was something of a pioneer for that method in the U.S.

But still, with 86 episodes, you’re going to have some duds. For me, The Sopranos was at its most slack in the fourth season (lots of Carmela mooning over Furio, Bobby Bacala’s endless mourning subplot) and the second half of “season 6A” (lots of junkies nodding out, Vito’s endless adventures in Gay Hampshire). These are the episodes where David Chase and the creative team seem to be vamping, putting off significant developments just because everyone was having too much fun making the show. So herewith, I go negative and present my five least favorite episodes of The Sopranos.



5. From Where to Eternity This season two episode is a long-standing fan favorite, but for me it was the first episode where the tone felt completely off. It had a bit of a Twin Peaks season two vibe, as badly wounded Christopher explains his vision of Hell as an Irish bar and Paulie consults a psychic. It also featured an all-too-obvious therapy scene in which Tony explains that he and his crew are not bad people but solders, and one of the least compelling whackings (of Christopher’s assailant Matt Bevilaqua). Michael Imperioli’s first writing job for the show, and you can tell.

4. Luxury Lounge The sagging midpoint of the sixth season began with Christopher and Little Carmine traveling to Hollywood to try to recruit Ben Kingsley for their mob-slasher movie Cleaver. Worthwhile for the scene in which Christopher mugs Lauren Bacall for her gift basket and the shot of put-upon chef Artie consulting his old family recipe book and regaining some measure of dignity. The rest of it is all inside jokes and rehashed storylines.

3. Johnny Cakes Another one from the meandering middle of S6. See! Fat Vito the mob capo romance a small-town fry-cook! See! Tony’s thrilling negotiations to sell out to Jamba Juice! See! AJ act like a spoiled idiot! All choppily edited (AJ’s hair jumps in length for one scene that was clearly shot for an earlier episode) and lacking in tension, save for AJ’s botched ‘hit’ on Uncle Junior (which in retrospect foreshadows his later bungled suicide attempt). Filler at its fillerest.



2. Calling All Cars And speaking of filler…after a string of largely listless episodes, the tension should have been mounting in this episode from late in the fourth season. Paulie was seemingly on the verge of jumping ship to Johnny Sack’s crew, and the prospect of a mob war between New York and New Jersey loomed (not for the first or last time). Instead we spent much of this hour with sister Janice as she tries to badger Bobby Bacala out of moping about his dead wife’s ziti. The last few minutes, with Tony waking from a dream into a disorienting Miami morning, are worth keeping. The rest should be dumped with Karen’s ziti.

1. Christopher The Christopher of the title is Columbus in this case, although this is another Imperioli script that should have stayed in the drawer. It’s actually more of a term paper, with the characters debating Italian cultural heritage, media images and the sanctity of the Columbus holiday. This episode also kicks off the whole “Bobby in mourning” storyline I’ve already bitched about. Just another hour of television.



Awright, enough with the negativity. Next up will be the honorable mentions that didn’t quite make the Top 10 final cut.